on dec 30 we had a surprise bday party for Jen, who finally turned 21. i didnt expect this bbq/ala carte movie marathon/stayover to be such a crazy deal. i spent the whole day just walking. to the market in the morning and back with a trolley full of groceries, to pioneer mall to pick up some remaining stuff, den back to market again to pick up the satay. my hips definitely didnt lie when they started to feel sore. and i need a better pair of slippers definitely. besides, there's plenty to worry about as well: the weather, the turnout, the atmosphere, the budget, blablabla. i was so zonked out i fell asleep somewhere thru the marathon. but still, i'm glad it turned out to be a nice lil gathering, even thou it's jus sitNtalk. and i have to give props and say a big thankyou to Bee who made the drool-worthy pineapple rice and for shopping with me.
Happy Birthday Tallone. (she's swooning over the cake)
food 
the ladies
dec 31st. i spent the first half of the day sleeping from the hangover of the previous night before i headed to ECP for seng's bday cleebration. i guess it was the hangover, cos i was in a screw-the-world mood and wasnt feeling very sociable. but seeing my army mates did open me up a little.it was nice to see everyone: Vik sporting a very Bollywood star hairstyle that got me askin if he permed his hair, jason who was perpetually high and i was so braindead i had to ask Liu bout his name at first, staff quek who came with daughter in tow, tsian yang who for once did not MIA, mr Ong Seng Keong whom i haven spoke to in a long while. ecp is damn big. so many people were having their countdowns there, tents n clothing lines from tree to tree in tact.
originally had plans for a countdown somewhere, but it was postponed at the last min. and so i spent my last mins of 06/first mins of 07 at ECP mac, where a malay family were celebrating together with a birthday. Malay families are generally more united. seeing the whole family, both young and old, playing with snow sprays and singing the bday song made my heart melt a lil, and i thought: it's not such a bad countdown after all. i was basically smiling as i watch them snow-spray each other for virtually close to 30mins. i had to take a pic.
it's decadent to spend the last few days of the yr feeling jaded and cynical. seeing that scenario made me realise how detached i am from that lifestyle. there's no single celebratory streak in me at all. i dun go to crazy celebrations and squeeze our heads and sweat it out anymore. we dun play with sparkles/snow spray/cakes anymore. somehow, it felt scary to move into a new yr. yet i am inspired that a celebration does not have to go out with a bang at a crowded place. just a few happy people who truely appreciate each other's company wld be enough to kiss a good end to a year. or any celebration for that matter.
those 2 days made me jaded because i felt the weight of the world on my shoulders. people from different aspects of my life congregate to rely on me. they assume i have the answers, or the energy to carry out wonders. at one point that day i felt like telling everyone do-u-tink-i'm-god? my colleagues come to me for plans when obviously i've ran out of it. and it sickens me when people dun pull their weight as promised. and it tears me to be the one who has to put an end to all this, yet odd enough i felt a sense of relief. i lacked the foresight to put an end to all of it when i could. it sld have been postponed right from the start. yet it manifested into this hellhole tt ended ugly. i hated it.
i seriously doubt how long i can handle all these. going home with Liu that night and telling him all my grievances makes me appreciate how important a listening ear can be. it was purely spontaneous, and i do not know what got me started at all. Liu seemed like the last person i wld speak to about my inner feelings, but somehow, it felt nice jus letting it out. sad enough, i also thought of the various people whom i might have the most possibility of speaking to. yet i could fine none.
it wasnt a great way to end off 06. but it was aight. seriously. i belief everything happens for a reason. coming home that night and sitting down to Joni Mitchell and an episode of Gilmore Girls got me a lil at peace with myself once again.
every year during this period, i wld feel a sense of loss. a sense of incompetence, that another year has passed and i have not achieved any thing. this yr, however, i took a close look at the past 12 months and assessed the yr.i realised 2006 has been good to me. it was eventful, to say the least.
my bday celebration. it clashed with the chi new yr and so i didnt plan anything. besides, i didnt wan ppl to feel any obligation. still, looking back, it was, imo, the best celebration i had. i felt the love, and for once i broke the unhappy-bday spell.
ORD. it was bittersweet. venturing into something that u've been dreaming all day long, counting down to it all along, yet when it comes, although the sense of relief was tremendous, i cant help but feel a sense of loss as well. leaving behind familarity is never easy for me, as much as i've desired change. "partin is such sweet sorrow". i parted ways with people whom i've "slept" with for a yr or so. parted ways with morning area cleaning and various disciplines. parted ways with restrictions and rigid regulations. yet allowing myself to try something new, something i've been waiting for....
a job at MJ. looking back, it's been 8 mths now. i am amazed. working for passion rocks. i met weird customers who smells cds/pushes trolley, nice ones like Miss 010 (the first 3 digits of her I/C cos she only rents vcds, doesnt buy them) who talked to me bout her family and whom i initially found a lil weird cos she was always asking for horror flicks. but she of the powder smell is very nice to serve. the old couple who remembered my name, the wife whose voice is so loud it's funny. seeing them in bliss at such a ripe age made me see the face of true love and marriage. and of cos the colleagues who made it so memorable. connie, who i misses ever so often cos she'd bitch with me bout ash and speak canto with me and makes me laugh. jeff with his buckteeth and smell who's so "hot" he was the talk of the town. jason the goldilock with "family value" tattooed in old eng across his chest as part of his portfolio for entry into a photog class in an art sch. he of the multi-job no-sleeper who dozes off at work. big/small jiahuis, cute/ quiet to the max. siangwei, the latest edition. addition, i mean. ash the bossy sup. shawn the yaonie. and yiwen the mosquito. these people are the heart and soul that makes an otherwise unbearable day bearable.
School. i've never had the best feleing bout goin to uniSIM, simply bcos it's not as recognised, and the opportunities slim. but i only have myself to blame for not having a decent uni education. everytime someone says that it's a good life with the slack schedule, i beg to differ. it's neither slack, nor is it as greater than the govt uni. but i've come to appreciate it and adapt to it, and with the newfound independence, it has given me a glimpse into the still-bleak future, and makes me realise that i've gotta work my ass off and really make it work this time now.
CSS Prom. it was an achievement. never have i been more proud of something that i have done, but on the other hand i know that the success would never be possible without the great team. once again, at least for me, it solidified the dedication we have to the sch and bonded us again after the long hiatus. i have a feeling big changes are gonna come. but i'm keeping my heads high and hoping for the best.
Sandy Lam. it truely is a fraction of my dream come true. the full blown ultimate dream wld be to catch her in HK. i've laughed, teared, partied, danced in 2.5 freakin hours. unbelievable.
great shows on tv. project runway!!! gilmore girls!!! ANTM!!! Survivor!!! and i cant wait for AI to be back on January.
on hindsight it has been a blast. i can only hope 07 to be even better.
new year resolutions
1. save enough for an Ipod. (like finally)
2. go to HK for shopping. jus go abroad.
3. save 5k.
4. return my debt.
5. get As for my modules.
6. physically fit!
7. be less apologetic or sorri for myself
8. learn to cook.
9. learn a musical instrument (this i have every yr. but oh well)
10. be happy.
to all who've endured this indulgent entry, happy 2007. may it be a blast for u.
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