i went on a swim yesterday, sunday, lacking the better knowledge that sunday pools are filled with kids, families, and crowds. so i went to the adult pool, and the corner lanes are filled with kids. without thinking too much, i swam in the middle lane. on the 2nd lap back, halfway round, it suddenly hit me that i was swimmin in the middle. the fear of drowning hit me. i tried to stay calm, but i was too nervous. i started to gasp for air and panic. i almost wanted to scream for help. during my moments underwater, in between breathes, i told myself to stay calm, stay calm. and luckily beside me was a lane-divider, which is basically a rope tied with buoys. i grabbed onto it and caught my breathe for a while, before slowly making my way back closer to the edge. it was a scary experience. really scary.
ad then the lifeguard was waiting for me at the end of the lap. i showed him a thumbs-up, and walked embarassingly to him. he told me to swim at the corner lanes if i am not a confident swimmer. for the rest of the time i got a lil paranoid that he might be talkin to the other lifeguards abt my shame. oh well.
i was truely afraid. i think after my fear of sucking in life, the fear of drowning is probably the most intense. i began to think what's gonna happen if i'm stuck in a plane crash next time. thank goodness for life vests. i think i'll be forever scarred now. my fear of water has now become my fear of drowning.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Friday, March 04, 2011
HONG KONG EXPEDITION DAY 1
it's been 2 year since i last sat in an airplane to travel far and beyond singapore waters. i was in good spirits, mostly because this trip feels like it's gonna be awesome - 2 concerts that i really wana go, meetup with friends, eating my favourite dimsum, buying canto cds, and immersing in a culture and language that i've enjoyed throughout my life. when one is in the mood, nothin much can bring them down. not the noisy indon couple beside me on the plane, who took most of my arm rest , drank too much red wine, and was watching Beyonce's concert on the inflight entertainment after seeing that i was tuned to it. i was puzzled why he didnt wana tune in with the headphones; he was watching B silently. it was when he later channel-surfed to Black Swan, also without audio, to a pirouetting Natalie Portman, that i suspected he's just lookin at girls. i was more humoured than disgusted. guess that's what happy hormones can do for you.
i was thinking at my previous travel experience to thr States wit Marc, and wondering why i didnt feel immensely happy the way i should be. i reasoned that we didnt have that much emotional honesty and history to begin with. marc is never one of many words, yet when he speaks i'm always taken aback by his smart intellect and unwitting humour. my cousin and i were never really close - we had fun growing up, but his world views and thoughts are different from mine. he sees no value in the arts; he's more interested in finance than less "practical" matters. somehow, i wish we cld do it all over again. i regretted relying too much on guide books and not the internet, and for making foolish decisions like wearing shorts and thongs (aussie slang for slippers) on the streets, and carrying a backpack instead of a suitcase.
i wished i had the wisdom now back then, and do it all over again. i also miss travelling in a big group, and not having to be the decision maker, but just tag along, and then go on and do my stuff whenever i like it, no obligations and no baggage.
sitting here in aiwei's living room (it's my makeshift bedroom, and it's so cosy i wish it was my actual bedroom), i felt peace. the world is quiet, the weather is just right, and the only sound i hear are my breathing , the fridge's soft drone, and my typing. this perfect little quaint house is just nice - all that one needs is here and around. on top of fulfilling the long-fantasised dream of seeing Faye in hongkong, i endeavoured this trip to be a rejuvenation, a nice getaway, and a tiny discovery and exploration of the self. i envisioned peace, but now tht everyone is fast asleep and all is quiet, this is the perfect piece of harmony that i did not expect.
i love the silence.
i was thinking at my previous travel experience to thr States wit Marc, and wondering why i didnt feel immensely happy the way i should be. i reasoned that we didnt have that much emotional honesty and history to begin with. marc is never one of many words, yet when he speaks i'm always taken aback by his smart intellect and unwitting humour. my cousin and i were never really close - we had fun growing up, but his world views and thoughts are different from mine. he sees no value in the arts; he's more interested in finance than less "practical" matters. somehow, i wish we cld do it all over again. i regretted relying too much on guide books and not the internet, and for making foolish decisions like wearing shorts and thongs (aussie slang for slippers) on the streets, and carrying a backpack instead of a suitcase.
i wished i had the wisdom now back then, and do it all over again. i also miss travelling in a big group, and not having to be the decision maker, but just tag along, and then go on and do my stuff whenever i like it, no obligations and no baggage.
sitting here in aiwei's living room (it's my makeshift bedroom, and it's so cosy i wish it was my actual bedroom), i felt peace. the world is quiet, the weather is just right, and the only sound i hear are my breathing , the fridge's soft drone, and my typing. this perfect little quaint house is just nice - all that one needs is here and around. on top of fulfilling the long-fantasised dream of seeing Faye in hongkong, i endeavoured this trip to be a rejuvenation, a nice getaway, and a tiny discovery and exploration of the self. i envisioned peace, but now tht everyone is fast asleep and all is quiet, this is the perfect piece of harmony that i did not expect.
i love the silence.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)