i woke up at 6am today for a Changi Airport trail.

waking up at 6am can do strange things to my head. i do not know whatever happened, but i was engulfed with fear and trepidition this morning. perhaps it was the long-break from doin trails, for fear that i might not perform up to standards today. further more i had high expectations to meet, given i'm friends with Ching Yee and almost have a reputation for performing, slightly due to looking like Jeremy. other than that, it was also a fear at how.... i dunno...how distant everything seemed.

taking 187 reminded me of going to sch during my css days. now i dun see sardin-packed 187s, and it seriously lacked a dash of refreshing blues.

on the bus, and during the trail, i realise that i do love kids. the talkative ones however annoying they can be, the smarty pants, and the adorably guai ones who follow instructions. radiating innocence never fails to put a smile on my face.

and having two kids with autism in my class made me wana know more bout the illness. i do not have much knowledge about it at all. therefore what i did today was to try my best to pay special attention to them, ensuring they do not get lost or run away on their own. it's disheartening to see that not every kid has a fair chance. the teacher paid so much attention to him that i had a glimpse into what i might be facing in the future. it must be tough for the families. and after msn-ing with xiang, it only discourages me more.

it's such a sad world if u look at it sometimes. hardship around the corners. stories untold by the unsung heroes. it must take alot of courage to do what some of us do daily.


sometimes, i think i am living in my own cacoon.